So I recently finished the entirety of Neil Gaiman's "The Sandman" comic books in their collected forms, and have lately had a weird sense of ennui. Why am I here? Where is this going? What's next for me? Has my life really been reduced to a series of waiting games between paychecks and trying to figure out if I can afford to go out for cheap sushi or a drink?
The answer to all of these questions is the same one: Yes and No.
Yes I am here (and no I'm not). Yes, this is going somewhere (but right now it's not). Yes, something is going to happen next (and no, I won't be able to see what it is). Yes, I play the waiting game and must strain my resources between paychecks and no, I don't exactly hate it. Yes I love cheap sushi and cheap booze. No, I shouldn't spend the money on those things.
Gaiman did a great job of telling stories that were about stories. There were all sorts of stories happening within each other, twisting and turning and tying together in ways that were both telegraphed and unexpected. It's difficult to really understand the enormity of what he wrote. I've read several of those volumes more than once and I still can't quite grasp it all; meaning is right there out of the corner of my eye, and when I turn to look it's completely gone.
Meaning.
So now I wonder where my story goes, or if there is a story to tell at all. I can romanticize it or tell it like it is. Or maybe there's a romantic beauty in just telling it like it is. "What is, is." I'm not sure if there's going to be anything to tell as life continues on for me, but when it does, I'm going to tell it here.
And that's the answer for now.
Spaces and places and faces and traces,
They turn and they turn,
And they all go to pieces.
And I can't describe
What's in front of my eyes.
It's just you.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Friday, October 9, 2009
Fall and Fall things.
Autumn/Fall is my absolute favorite season. A lot of great things have happened to me in the Fall, and a lot of great things happen every Fall regardless. Now that my engagement along with the beginning of Josh and I's relationship is synonymous with the season, it's even got sappy undertones.
Fall's got great beverages like apple cider and orange cocoa and stuff made with rum. It's got great food that you can feel guilt-free about. It's got great movies (our Netflix queue has been dominated by horror and thrillers lately--"The Thing" remake, "Adams Family Values" and "The Unborn" are on their way today). It's got such a friendly atmosphere that Winter can almost match, but only barely.
The thing about Winter is that while the holidays generate that warm and fuzzy feeling in us all, there's still that undertone of commercialism and panic that comes with this need to give and create perfection amongst complete and utter chaos. Anyone who has worked retail during the Christmas season will tell you this--9 hours a day on your feet helping ungrateful people will suck the spirit of the season right out of you, even if you're wearing a gold lapel pin that lights up and plays "Carol of the Bells."
However there's no such obligation during Fall (save the end of the season when American Thanksgiving transitions us into Winter). Yet doesn't it seem like everyone seems friendlier or happier or just a bit more cheerful? It's this electricity in the air that can't be matched. A sense of fun and carefree and routine, really, that's left over from the Summer and needs to burst into the atmosphere before Winter forces us all indoors and out of each other's way. The Fall is our last chance to get out and do something; to travel or take a walk with short sleeves on or get out of the house on a daily basis. It's this unspoken energy that runs along the surface of the days in the Fall that truly makes me love the season.
Not to mention that for Seattle, we've had an absolutely beautiful Fall this year.
Next weekend we're driving out to Coeur d'Alene to see my family. I'm hoping the weather stays strong for our trip. 7 hours is a long drive, but it'll be worth it to see them all for a bit. My family decorates the hell out of their home for Halloween, and I can't wait to see what absurdities my dad has created this year. I have such vivid memories of getting bundled up and decorating the outside of the house with him (really, I'm sure I was running around and un-boxing decorations and causing more distractions then help--yet he still let me "help" in my own way). Although when I was very young it was more likely an apartment or two bedroom rental or duplex; we lived in so many homes when I was small, but my family managed to make every single one feel as homey as possible. Decorating it for Halloween was one way that my parents maintained that sense of normalcy for me.
After an hour or more or when ever the serious decorating had to begin, my mom would scoop me up and put me inside with some apple cider and a snack, and leave me with the television playing Halloween-themed Disney cartoons while she went outside to help my dad finish. I was a pretty self-sufficient kid, or so I've been told. My parents couldn't have been much older than Josh and I are now; they were so young. it would be neat to go back and see if they were anything like us in those early days, fresh out of school with a kid and not much money and not much of a life plan, either.
"I'm dead babe; dead as dead can be.
It's all because a zombie ate me.
You loved me when I was alive,
But now you see that I'm on the other side.
I still wanna go out with you,
But there's something that you've gotta do.
Give your life up and over to me.
Come on, you'll see how happy we can be."
Fall's got great beverages like apple cider and orange cocoa and stuff made with rum. It's got great food that you can feel guilt-free about. It's got great movies (our Netflix queue has been dominated by horror and thrillers lately--"The Thing" remake, "Adams Family Values" and "The Unborn" are on their way today). It's got such a friendly atmosphere that Winter can almost match, but only barely.
The thing about Winter is that while the holidays generate that warm and fuzzy feeling in us all, there's still that undertone of commercialism and panic that comes with this need to give and create perfection amongst complete and utter chaos. Anyone who has worked retail during the Christmas season will tell you this--9 hours a day on your feet helping ungrateful people will suck the spirit of the season right out of you, even if you're wearing a gold lapel pin that lights up and plays "Carol of the Bells."
However there's no such obligation during Fall (save the end of the season when American Thanksgiving transitions us into Winter). Yet doesn't it seem like everyone seems friendlier or happier or just a bit more cheerful? It's this electricity in the air that can't be matched. A sense of fun and carefree and routine, really, that's left over from the Summer and needs to burst into the atmosphere before Winter forces us all indoors and out of each other's way. The Fall is our last chance to get out and do something; to travel or take a walk with short sleeves on or get out of the house on a daily basis. It's this unspoken energy that runs along the surface of the days in the Fall that truly makes me love the season.
Not to mention that for Seattle, we've had an absolutely beautiful Fall this year.
Next weekend we're driving out to Coeur d'Alene to see my family. I'm hoping the weather stays strong for our trip. 7 hours is a long drive, but it'll be worth it to see them all for a bit. My family decorates the hell out of their home for Halloween, and I can't wait to see what absurdities my dad has created this year. I have such vivid memories of getting bundled up and decorating the outside of the house with him (really, I'm sure I was running around and un-boxing decorations and causing more distractions then help--yet he still let me "help" in my own way). Although when I was very young it was more likely an apartment or two bedroom rental or duplex; we lived in so many homes when I was small, but my family managed to make every single one feel as homey as possible. Decorating it for Halloween was one way that my parents maintained that sense of normalcy for me.
After an hour or more or when ever the serious decorating had to begin, my mom would scoop me up and put me inside with some apple cider and a snack, and leave me with the television playing Halloween-themed Disney cartoons while she went outside to help my dad finish. I was a pretty self-sufficient kid, or so I've been told. My parents couldn't have been much older than Josh and I are now; they were so young. it would be neat to go back and see if they were anything like us in those early days, fresh out of school with a kid and not much money and not much of a life plan, either.
"I'm dead babe; dead as dead can be.
It's all because a zombie ate me.
You loved me when I was alive,
But now you see that I'm on the other side.
I still wanna go out with you,
But there's something that you've gotta do.
Give your life up and over to me.
Come on, you'll see how happy we can be."
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
A huge gap in time means a HUGE blog entry, yes?
Hello, internets!
It's been a while since I've blogged. Well, 3 months to be exact. I have no one but myself to blame for this, as it's been my laziness compounded with my busy work schedule and the fact that I'm in a new place where a social life is not just a dream but a bank-account devouring reality that has kept me from documenting my Post-Graduate Experience here at The Present Tense.
Maybe I need to hire a staff writer to help me maintain things? I can twitter about what's happening and that said writer can gather up all of my tweets and meld them into a discernible blog entry form his/her position chained to my desk with a bed pan secured safely beneath their seat.
Or I could just update more.
In the spirit of open and honest communication, if I don't blog on a more regular business and you're out there reading this, please write me an e-mail or send me a message on Facebook telling to stop being such a lazy ass-hat and do some writing, won't you? It could help me more than you realize.
Let's back-track to some cold, hard facts about my life right now:
1) I'm broke. My job is great and there are plenty of hours to go around so I do spend most of my time working, however I've been just about breaking even every month once bills are paid off. My savings account is mostly drained (wouldn't mother be proud?) and the student loans are really putting a strain on all things fun and entertaining. I get coffee and movies with my friends. A lot. And sushi! Ah, to be in a city where you can get good sushi is something that's been just a pipe dream until moving here. And speaking of moving . . .
2) . . . I love it here. Seattle was just the remedy for that melancholy, mopey and morose mood that I'd been in all Spring (what's with the alliteration there, Dr. Seuss?). I've lost weight, I feel healthier, I'm around a diverse mix of people with different backgrounds and viewpoints on a semi-regular basis, and I live within walking distance of a Starbucks. Also I can actually take part in an active music scene because, lo and behold, there IS one! I've gone to more live shows and bigger concerts in these past few months than I had all year last year. I've had the privilege of seeing No Doubt, The Sounds, and The Dead Weather as well as some fantastic local acts like Rising Tides and Ada Loveless (both completely blogworthy, although the former is sadly breaking up quite soon). So despite the fact that I'm financially ruined at the moment, my rose-colored glasses remain firmly in position.
3) I'm engaged! It still seems surreal. Josh proposed on our fifth year anniversary while we were making a trip to Leavenworth (which for those out there who don't know is a Bavarian-themed village about 2 hours East of Seattle that is essentially a piece of Disneyland that was cut off from the main host body and wandered out to the Pacific Northwest to spawn [in a very John Carpenter-esque way I might add]). There are pictures from that day, and I will post them when I remember to (perhaps tomorrow).
So that's what's going on with me.
The job hunt is still active, though I did take a break from it in September to relax. I've sent out many a resume and many a groveling letter begging for even non-paid volunteer work, yet have heard nothing back. Twice I received a response asking for writing samples, and twice did I sent some, and twice was I left with no further correspondence. It's a rough time to be a liberal arts major right now, to be honest. We're a dime-a-dozen, especially in a city like Seattle. So the search for meaning continues, albeit slowly and with little luck, but thankfully my folks have been so busy dealing with keeping the business afloat and several deaths in the family (a separate blog entry altogether for another time) that they've stopped breathing down my neck about what's next . . . Sort of. I completely understand their apprehension, and with promises of my application to UW for a graduate program in Communications or English they're satiated for the moment. Still, for my sanity and theirs I hope that something comes along in the "soon" region of time.
By the way, this makes the baby Jesus cry.
I leave you now with some pictures of our new place here in Seattle (as promised back when we moved in 3 months ago), and some words of wisdom.
I'm broke but I'm happy.
I'm poor but I'm kind.
I'm short but I'm healthy, yeah
I'm high but I'm grounded.
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed.
I'm lost but I'm hopeful baby
What it all comes down to,
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine;
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket,
and the other one is giving a high five.
It's been a while since I've blogged. Well, 3 months to be exact. I have no one but myself to blame for this, as it's been my laziness compounded with my busy work schedule and the fact that I'm in a new place where a social life is not just a dream but a bank-account devouring reality that has kept me from documenting my Post-Graduate Experience here at The Present Tense.
Maybe I need to hire a staff writer to help me maintain things? I can twitter about what's happening and that said writer can gather up all of my tweets and meld them into a discernible blog entry form his/her position chained to my desk with a bed pan secured safely beneath their seat.
Or I could just update more.
In the spirit of open and honest communication, if I don't blog on a more regular business and you're out there reading this, please write me an e-mail or send me a message on Facebook telling to stop being such a lazy ass-hat and do some writing, won't you? It could help me more than you realize.
Let's back-track to some cold, hard facts about my life right now:
1) I'm broke. My job is great and there are plenty of hours to go around so I do spend most of my time working, however I've been just about breaking even every month once bills are paid off. My savings account is mostly drained (wouldn't mother be proud?) and the student loans are really putting a strain on all things fun and entertaining. I get coffee and movies with my friends. A lot. And sushi! Ah, to be in a city where you can get good sushi is something that's been just a pipe dream until moving here. And speaking of moving . . .
2) . . . I love it here. Seattle was just the remedy for that melancholy, mopey and morose mood that I'd been in all Spring (what's with the alliteration there, Dr. Seuss?). I've lost weight, I feel healthier, I'm around a diverse mix of people with different backgrounds and viewpoints on a semi-regular basis, and I live within walking distance of a Starbucks. Also I can actually take part in an active music scene because, lo and behold, there IS one! I've gone to more live shows and bigger concerts in these past few months than I had all year last year. I've had the privilege of seeing No Doubt, The Sounds, and The Dead Weather as well as some fantastic local acts like Rising Tides and Ada Loveless (both completely blogworthy, although the former is sadly breaking up quite soon). So despite the fact that I'm financially ruined at the moment, my rose-colored glasses remain firmly in position.
3) I'm engaged! It still seems surreal. Josh proposed on our fifth year anniversary while we were making a trip to Leavenworth (which for those out there who don't know is a Bavarian-themed village about 2 hours East of Seattle that is essentially a piece of Disneyland that was cut off from the main host body and wandered out to the Pacific Northwest to spawn [in a very John Carpenter-esque way I might add]). There are pictures from that day, and I will post them when I remember to (perhaps tomorrow).
So that's what's going on with me.
The job hunt is still active, though I did take a break from it in September to relax. I've sent out many a resume and many a groveling letter begging for even non-paid volunteer work, yet have heard nothing back. Twice I received a response asking for writing samples, and twice did I sent some, and twice was I left with no further correspondence. It's a rough time to be a liberal arts major right now, to be honest. We're a dime-a-dozen, especially in a city like Seattle. So the search for meaning continues, albeit slowly and with little luck, but thankfully my folks have been so busy dealing with keeping the business afloat and several deaths in the family (a separate blog entry altogether for another time) that they've stopped breathing down my neck about what's next . . . Sort of. I completely understand their apprehension, and with promises of my application to UW for a graduate program in Communications or English they're satiated for the moment. Still, for my sanity and theirs I hope that something comes along in the "soon" region of time.
By the way, this makes the baby Jesus cry.
I leave you now with some pictures of our new place here in Seattle (as promised back when we moved in 3 months ago), and some words of wisdom.
I'm broke but I'm happy.
I'm poor but I'm kind.
I'm short but I'm healthy, yeah
I'm high but I'm grounded.
I'm sane but I'm overwhelmed.
I'm lost but I'm hopeful baby
What it all comes down to,
Is that everything's gonna be fine fine fine;
'cause I've got one hand in my pocket,
and the other one is giving a high five.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Apparently nothing of importance happened in April?
Well, that title isn't actually true. A lot of important stuff happened in April.
I got the job transfer, for one. Yay me! I'm not supposed to talk about which store it is or what I'll be doing, but apparently the pay is substantial, which I'm thoroughly stoked for. Hooray for the monies!
What else? Well, Kim moved in with us up here in Moscow and it's been fun and absurd. I like having her around more seeing as she's become one of my closest friends through the years, and it's nice having some time to adjust to each other's habits before living together for realsies in a place we both pay rent on. Of course there aren't that many things to get used to--It's just like when she'd crash here for the weekend if there was partying to be had, except for now her stuff is here. Kim's a very good roommate thus far and really it's not like we all just jumped head first in on this idea. Would I room with someone who wasn't awesome? I think not!
Hmm, let's see . . . Ally came up to visit us for a weekend and that was amazingly fun, even though we didn't do much. It was like having her back in Moscow again on any other weekend, which is fine by me! She's off to Virginia in a while to be with her-Josh (attaching those little is how we distinguish the men we're with, btw) for 6 weeks and then off to Florida so that they can work on the next stage of their lives together, whatever that ends up being. It was good to see her and talk to her and to see that I'm not the only one who has no idea what the hell they're doing now that undergrad time is over. "Whatever happens next is up to us, and I don't feel rushed for the first time in my life," she said to me over bagels. We had a great hug and goodbye when she left, and the feeling of "this is just temporary because I'll see you soon" was totally there in a way that was said and unsaid at the same time.
Although my friends are all scattered to the four winds now, why do I feel like we'll all see each other again soon? I guess because we're all very co-dependent on each other. Like, we can do stuff separately, but we'd rather all not. Part of me selfishly wants to horde my friends over to Seattle some day when they're all settled and ready to settle down.
I turned 23 the other day, and it was weird. It feels a lot like 22, actually. So far so good. It's only been a few days, so maybe some profound change will happen. Or maybe not. Josh and I went out to dinner and then saw the new Wolverine movie with Kim and our pal Clare. Hugh Jackman-ass is the best kind of man-ass that there is, and I'll stand by that assertion for years! I liked it overall, and there were only a few things that made me laugh because of how lame they were, but it was overall a fun popcorn movie. Not exactly "Sophie's Choice" or anything, but c'mon . . . It's comics.
So in less than 20 days I'll be in a new city with a new start. Wish me luck, and if I don't post for another month . . . It's because I'm somewhere else being awesome!
"I build myself up,
and fly around in circles.
Wait then--As my heart drops,
and my back begins to tingle,
finally could this be it?"
I got the job transfer, for one. Yay me! I'm not supposed to talk about which store it is or what I'll be doing, but apparently the pay is substantial, which I'm thoroughly stoked for. Hooray for the monies!
What else? Well, Kim moved in with us up here in Moscow and it's been fun and absurd. I like having her around more seeing as she's become one of my closest friends through the years, and it's nice having some time to adjust to each other's habits before living together for realsies in a place we both pay rent on. Of course there aren't that many things to get used to--It's just like when she'd crash here for the weekend if there was partying to be had, except for now her stuff is here. Kim's a very good roommate thus far and really it's not like we all just jumped head first in on this idea. Would I room with someone who wasn't awesome? I think not!
Hmm, let's see . . . Ally came up to visit us for a weekend and that was amazingly fun, even though we didn't do much. It was like having her back in Moscow again on any other weekend, which is fine by me! She's off to Virginia in a while to be with her-Josh (attaching those little is how we distinguish the men we're with, btw) for 6 weeks and then off to Florida so that they can work on the next stage of their lives together, whatever that ends up being. It was good to see her and talk to her and to see that I'm not the only one who has no idea what the hell they're doing now that undergrad time is over. "Whatever happens next is up to us, and I don't feel rushed for the first time in my life," she said to me over bagels. We had a great hug and goodbye when she left, and the feeling of "this is just temporary because I'll see you soon" was totally there in a way that was said and unsaid at the same time.
Although my friends are all scattered to the four winds now, why do I feel like we'll all see each other again soon? I guess because we're all very co-dependent on each other. Like, we can do stuff separately, but we'd rather all not. Part of me selfishly wants to horde my friends over to Seattle some day when they're all settled and ready to settle down.
I turned 23 the other day, and it was weird. It feels a lot like 22, actually. So far so good. It's only been a few days, so maybe some profound change will happen. Or maybe not. Josh and I went out to dinner and then saw the new Wolverine movie with Kim and our pal Clare. Hugh Jackman-ass is the best kind of man-ass that there is, and I'll stand by that assertion for years! I liked it overall, and there were only a few things that made me laugh because of how lame they were, but it was overall a fun popcorn movie. Not exactly "Sophie's Choice" or anything, but c'mon . . . It's comics.
So in less than 20 days I'll be in a new city with a new start. Wish me luck, and if I don't post for another month . . . It's because I'm somewhere else being awesome!
"I build myself up,
and fly around in circles.
Wait then--As my heart drops,
and my back begins to tingle,
finally could this be it?"
Monday, March 30, 2009
Why does your face look like that?
I'm getting a little tired of people acting like I have a terminal illness.
Let me back up a bit: I don't have a terminal illness. I'm quite healthy, actually. But others have not-so-subtly pointed out to me that I appear to have a debilitating disease where I graduated from college and now am doing nothing.
Let me back up again: I'm not doing "nothing." I've got a job that I work 30 hours a week at, I'm paying bills, and I'm writing all the time. Sure I don't have an internship or a journalism desk job that takes up 95% of my time yet totals 5% of my income, but I'm only hanging around this town until May. I graduated at the end of December, and I'm leaving at the end of May. That's a total of 5 months where I've had to essentially start from scratch and not only try to hone what skills I've earned with my degree, but also try to save money and salvage my post-college/pre-career existence while I can.
So then why do people who ask me what I'm up to cringe when I tell them "not much, just working and hanging out until I move in May?" It's like this weird reflexive action they have which they just can't seem to hide. There's this look as though I've just told them that my dog died, or that I'm going into rehab, or that I have terminal cancer. This sort of knee-jerk widening of the eyes coupled with a thin, smarmy smile and a phrase that carries an air of mock-understanding and sympathy ("Oh, wow, well good. That's good that you're working.").
Sorry folks, I didn't move home with my parents and I didn't just return to my "home town" because if you want to get technical then my home town was Los Angeles. Seriously Idaho, there are other places besides Coeur d'Alene and Boise. I see people all the time on Myspace or Facebook or in the UI Alumni Magazine (which I receive in the mail now along with a helping of guilt for not financially supporting my alma mater) who moved back tot heir home town and have started some kind of career. A guy I graduated with is now working at a TV station in Twin Falls.
But here's the thing: That's Twin. Falls. Idaho.
And that's fine. Do whatever you'd like and go where you'd like to go. It's just that my aspirations go beyond this state. I don't want to just go back to the comforts of home to a place that's familiar. It's the same reason I didn't do community college right after high school. It's the same reason I didn't just try and get a desk job at the local paper here in Moscow. I like to experience new things. I like to live on the edge of my seat. I like having a warm place to call home, but I also like that place to have a sense of wonder or excitement.
Maybe that's why, after 5 years in my undergrad, Moscow has almost completely lost its charm.
I don't know what to see to these people that act as though I've just told them I've been diagnosed with HIV-I when I tell them I'm in a working, hanging out, sort of grace period between my undergrad and the start of my career. Except to tell them that I didn't run home to mommy like everyone else and that I actually have had to work since day 1 in college, and that I've still got to work because I pay my own bills, so that's why I couldn't just up and go home.
I want to tell them to go hang out with the skeptics, who are the other group of people that are infuriating me at the moment (I feel like the Palouse region [meaning Moscow, Pullman, Lewiston, etc.] can be divided up into 3 groups of people right now who are reacting to my life choices: The Sympathies, The Skeptics, and The Supporters). But third-party skepticism of my life choices is a whole other post that's probably more rant-y and less rational.
Oh, internet. I'm glad that I can vent to you. When I look back at this chronicle of my post-grad existence, hopefully it'll be from a place where I can smile and just say "ha."
"Sometimes I feel
That I need to move on.
So I pack a bag
And move on;
Move on."
Let me back up a bit: I don't have a terminal illness. I'm quite healthy, actually. But others have not-so-subtly pointed out to me that I appear to have a debilitating disease where I graduated from college and now am doing nothing.
Let me back up again: I'm not doing "nothing." I've got a job that I work 30 hours a week at, I'm paying bills, and I'm writing all the time. Sure I don't have an internship or a journalism desk job that takes up 95% of my time yet totals 5% of my income, but I'm only hanging around this town until May. I graduated at the end of December, and I'm leaving at the end of May. That's a total of 5 months where I've had to essentially start from scratch and not only try to hone what skills I've earned with my degree, but also try to save money and salvage my post-college/pre-career existence while I can.
So then why do people who ask me what I'm up to cringe when I tell them "not much, just working and hanging out until I move in May?" It's like this weird reflexive action they have which they just can't seem to hide. There's this look as though I've just told them that my dog died, or that I'm going into rehab, or that I have terminal cancer. This sort of knee-jerk widening of the eyes coupled with a thin, smarmy smile and a phrase that carries an air of mock-understanding and sympathy ("Oh, wow, well good. That's good that you're working.").
Sorry folks, I didn't move home with my parents and I didn't just return to my "home town" because if you want to get technical then my home town was Los Angeles. Seriously Idaho, there are other places besides Coeur d'Alene and Boise. I see people all the time on Myspace or Facebook or in the UI Alumni Magazine (which I receive in the mail now along with a helping of guilt for not financially supporting my alma mater) who moved back tot heir home town and have started some kind of career. A guy I graduated with is now working at a TV station in Twin Falls.
But here's the thing: That's Twin. Falls. Idaho.
And that's fine. Do whatever you'd like and go where you'd like to go. It's just that my aspirations go beyond this state. I don't want to just go back to the comforts of home to a place that's familiar. It's the same reason I didn't do community college right after high school. It's the same reason I didn't just try and get a desk job at the local paper here in Moscow. I like to experience new things. I like to live on the edge of my seat. I like having a warm place to call home, but I also like that place to have a sense of wonder or excitement.
Maybe that's why, after 5 years in my undergrad, Moscow has almost completely lost its charm.
I don't know what to see to these people that act as though I've just told them I've been diagnosed with HIV-I when I tell them I'm in a working, hanging out, sort of grace period between my undergrad and the start of my career. Except to tell them that I didn't run home to mommy like everyone else and that I actually have had to work since day 1 in college, and that I've still got to work because I pay my own bills, so that's why I couldn't just up and go home.
I want to tell them to go hang out with the skeptics, who are the other group of people that are infuriating me at the moment (I feel like the Palouse region [meaning Moscow, Pullman, Lewiston, etc.] can be divided up into 3 groups of people right now who are reacting to my life choices: The Sympathies, The Skeptics, and The Supporters). But third-party skepticism of my life choices is a whole other post that's probably more rant-y and less rational.
Oh, internet. I'm glad that I can vent to you. When I look back at this chronicle of my post-grad existence, hopefully it'll be from a place where I can smile and just say "ha."
"Sometimes I feel
That I need to move on.
So I pack a bag
And move on;
Move on."
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