Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Wedding Things

Don't think that just because I haven't written much about it lately, it doesn't mean that my impending nups aren't taking up a good chunk of time/thoughts/energy. Quite the opposite: It's all we talk about lately. Which is fine. I mean, it's sort of a big deal.

Right now we're super close and have a lot of stuff done, but there's still a ton to do. We need to go buy our suits. We need to finish the decorations (we have amassed all of the materials, thankfully). We need to finish the wedding web site so that we can send the Invitations. We need to go scope hotels for our friends and family in the area to stay. We need to get Julie's backyard landscaped for the big day. We need to order tables and chairs and linens.

Biggest of all? We need to decide on structure.

Here's how the big day is planned thus far:

4pm to 5pm: People arrive and have some food and booze and hang out.
5pm to 6pm: ?????????
6pm to 7pm: Food, drinks, CAKE, and toasting.
7pm to Whenever: Dancing and getting hammered with friends and family.

Yeah, so, we don't know what we're going to do for a ceremony. The hard part about all of this is that there are very limited resources out there re: gay weddings, and those that exist really suck ass. If the suggestions and content aren't big and homo and flashy, they're absurdly trite or vice versa. Josh and I had a super-serio shower talk about it, and we came to the conclusion that we need to do what's best for us and what our ideal situation is.

The problem with that? My ideal scenario is just he and I, out in nature somewhere, totally alone, proclaiming our love to each other as the sun sets or rises or does whatever it wants to do. Then we make love and call it a day and we're married and everyone else can shut up.

His ideal scenario is a bit more . . . Grandiose. There are hundreds of people and cater waiters and hella stuff and a DJ and a dance floor.

Since we can't afford his ideal wedding scenario and mine seems like a scene from JD Salinger, we decided to try and find a happy medium. Which meant backyard wedding, less than 100 people, very simple food and drink, and very simple everything. But there's still the matter of ceremonial structure. Do we do the officiant/lines of people/super-duper structured vows thing? Or do we just go up there, say something quick and heartfelt with no one being "master of ceremonies" and then call it a night? Or do we opt out of it completely?

I don't know yet. I like the wedding in the film "Rachel Getting Married." The couple had an audience, but the audience stood in a circle around them. They had an officiant, but that person was their mutual friend. They had lines, but there were like 4 guys and 4 girls and all of them were only sort of wearing matching things. The ceremony was brief, and so were the vows, and at the end everyone cheered and threw glitter and confetti into the air. I love that scene.

What are your thoughts, gentle readers?

"Come on, let's talk about our feelings!
I don't care if what you say is needless."

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