Everything new is new again.

I started my new job yesterday. I'm training at the Northgate Mall (just 10ish minutes north from our place) to be the Full-Time Assistant Manager of a brand-new, currently under construction Forever 21 store in downtown Seattle, on the corner of Sixth and Pine in the crazy-ass shopping district of downtown.

Now say what you will about the company (the weird "John 3:16" thing comes to mind, as does the scandal from a few years ago re: child labour used to manufacture some of the merchandise), but it truly is one of the largest and fastest growing retailers in the States right now. They're even expanding to Europe in 2012, and the recession has pretty much left them unphased (much like the last company I worked for, Hot Topic). The new Seattle store is going to be one of their "anchor stores" and is expected to have huuuuuge volume and figures.

Is it intimidating? Hell yes. Is it what I ever pictured myself doing? Not really, no. But retail is something I'm good at. There's something about my personality that makes me a good seller. It's probably the writer in me that causes me to casually b.s. my way through life when really I have no idea what I'm doing; or the part of me that genuinely wants to please people and just make it so that they're happy with me.

In any event, this job is solid, it pays well, and it's going to allow me to have more free time to work on personal projects like this here blog and some of my (nerdy snort) fan fiction I've been neglecting for over a year. Not only that, but I can now categorically say that the collection of short stories inspired by modern music is officially underway! I began a notes/outline/crazy ass scribbling of ideas prospective for a story inspired by M83's "Kim & Jessie" last night. The idea is to tell the story of a suicide pact between two social outcast teenagers in the late 1980s that goes awry. See also: The movie "Heathers" and the fact that I've been listening to The Cure a lot lately.

So when I start the new job officially and training is over, I'll become a true Seattlite and start riding the damned bus to and from work every day. I need to find a good messenger bag or shoulder bag to carry all my crap in. Any good suggestions?



"Dreams dressed in blue,
It's all they need now and forever.
Chased by the moon;
They shatter their presence with their singing."

Internet Crushes, pt.1

A slight follow up on yesterday's post re: adorable people on the Internets. I'd like to take the opportunity to list some random people I've been crushing on either because they're a) adorable or b) awesome bloggers/writers/etc. or c)a combination of options "a" and "b."

Please note that I've never once met any of these people, but still find their internet-personas fantastic enough to gush about each and every thing that they do to all of my cohorts and pals.

Spreading the love to the following 5 People of Interest!

1. Caleb Goellner: A writer for various comic/word nerd/pop culture sites out there including Comic Book Resources and ComicsAlliance, Mr. Goellner is an Internet crush of mine because he's not only witty and hilarious, but because he's freaking adorable. Also, he loves pugs. Which means I loves he and his postings.

2. Monica Guzman: You know how sometimes you read those blogs out there, and the person's "voice" and sensibilities are so similar to yours that it's awesome yet completely eerie? Monica Guzman is my "holy crap it's like she's ME!!!!!11" person. She writes for The Big Blog, an aspect of the Seattle PI (which went totally online and totally tossed its print edition right when I moved out there, thus crushing my dreams . . . No hard feelings though, dudes!). She was recently featured in the Seattle Weekly, and also in my heart.

3. Kate Beaton: Writer/artist/genius behind the web-comic/blog "Hark, a vagrant," milady Beaton never ceases to amaze me with her charming drawerings and insight into pop culture and literature. When she combines the two, if I could quote my college roomie Derrick for a second when describing beer, "it's like heaven on a pink and fluffy cloud." Damn right, D-Rock. Damn right.

4. This freaking cutie on Threadless.com and his puppy!: He's hot, and that dog looks like a Pokemon. Melt!

5. Dan Savage: The one, the only, the amazing sexpert himself has written for dozens of publications both print and web-based, contributes to various radio and television programs, and is the star of many an "OMG I super-duper-for-realsies wanna meet that celebrity!" day-dreams of mine. I met him once for all of a minute about 2 years ago when he was doing one of his infamous sex talks at U of Idaho, and got him to sign his books "The Kid" and "The Commitment" for Josh. He was pretty chill, and I thought about offering to buy him a cocktail, but decided this would probably come off as nutty. Then again, so does this blog post . . . Ah well, six to one; half a dozen of the other; he's hot and damn it he can write.


"Eyes lit:
I want short breaths.
I've got dark eye lids.
I need the sun in to repent."

Brrrrrrrrrrr

It's HELLA cold in Seattle. You know I mean it because I used the word "hella" in a sentence without a hint of snark.

Although, since you can't sense snark on the Internets you'll have to trust me when I say that the use of the word "hella" is part of a snark-free zone.

Side-Bar: "Hella" is recognized by my Mac as a real world, but "snark" is not. When did this happen, of computer of mine?

But yeah, it's hella cold and I love how this city freaks out about it. The snow makes Seattle piss its pants and forget itself, which is hilar and terrifying all at once. I'm going to have to be a cautious driver again, and you all know how I hate being the bigger person.

I'm working on an "It's Hella Cold" mix. So far all I've got is a track by New Young Pony Club (that super-duper-awesome-one-you-guys that was played on Gossip Girl like a month ago), "Secrets" by OneRepublic, and "Crystalized" by The XX. A hunt for new tunes is definitely in order! Short order, you might say.

Today we went with Brian and Gabby to the Sunday Market in Fremont and saw lots of cool things. Things like a turn-of-the-century type writer that I fucking had a massive want-boner for, and this guy was selling it for $20. A disturbingly good deal, and here I had no cash.

But alas, I'm sort of waiting for some of my moneys to get dispersed back to me. I, like several hundred other Seattleites, recently had my identity stolen. Apparently anyone living in or boozing it up in or eating foods in the Capitol Hill area was a target. I personally had around $200 stolen from me, but luckily my bank kicks ass and flagged the phony charges. I'm waiting on $90 of that bunch to still be returned--right now it's just a provincial credit, but I'd rather not tempt fate, you know? I'll wait until it's real dollars in there and not imaginary pseudo-dollars.

Anyway, it was really cool to see everyone out and about despite the cold supporting local vendors and crafters. I will be back with moneys for you, kick-ass type writer! After we browsed, we had pho. It was really nice for this cold I'm starting to get (yes, it's time for my annual "cold of perpetuity" whereupon I'll have a cough and the sniffles for about 2 months). Alli says that during this time I'm a lot like a Dickensian orphan struggling with the black lung, guv'nor.

Speaking of Alli, last week Ellen and Alli and I had a "ninja photo shoot" in the arboretum. Details/photos will hit this blog as soon as Ellen is done editing them. It's for a calendar for their friends in Korea. I played a bank robber. Juuuuuuudge.

Un-Related: This is the most adorable thing I've scene on the Internet all month. A cute scruffy and tatted boy holding a corgi puppy like his own personal piratey parrot? WHERE DO I SIGN. Note that it's not even a question as to where.

Today I watched the first 20 minisodes of that new Avengers cartoon on Comics Alliance. It's actually not half bad, for having very "kid friendly" animation. It views a lot like the first run of the Justice League cartoon that Timm and Dini did in the late 90s/2000s. Lots of epic moments and cool cameos, new-to-universe accessibility in stories, and nods to fans. If you can get past some of the cheesy dialog clearly aimed at the childrens, it's totally worth it. And kudos/balls for including The Mandrill. Here's hoping that it gets a few good seasons and segues into a more badass version of itself, much like the JL cartoon did when it turned into "Justice League Unlimited." Would I love to see a similarly plotted series featuring a rotating cast of Avengers characters? Oh you bet your ass I would. Especially if it would mean animated Kate Bishop or animated O'Grady Ant-Man.

This week we'll be hitting the road and heading back to Idaho to be with my family for Thanksgiving. I'll be skipping entires for a day or two while we enjoy family time, but I might need to therapy-rant on here while we visit, so be on the look out for that . . .

. . . Also, be on the look-out for THIS!

That's right kids, my piece for Mutineer on the fine folks at Coffee Strong was published in the annual Holiday issue (Nov/Dec for the layman among you)!

Because I love you, loyal readers, I'll link you to the Internet-only version found right here.

However, you'd be doing me and my pals at Mutineer a huge favor by getting out there and buying yourself a copy. How else will you see the AMAZING photography work done by Josh Mackey and Mike Bowen? You could Google it, I guess, but you would probably fail in an epic sort of way. So go grab yourself an ish, yeah?

If I don't see you before then, Happy Thanksgiving, folks!

"I like the bad boys,

In the big towns.

I like the bad bands

And their big sounds."

The Twitching Hour(s).

I think that between the hours of 12:30 and 2:30 at my job, I've achieved new states of boredom. I can't access Facebook on the business internet, which is unfortunate, but even then I think it would have its limits of any sort of entertainment factor.

Today has been exceptionally slow. Over half of a family reunion just checked out, and what was a group of 30 individual rooms is now down to around 10. They were all lovely people, for the most part, with nothing but good things to say. Which is rare given that in every family there are always the stcik-in-the-mud/no-way-in-hell-can-I-ever-be-happy types. Anyway, with those folks gone and very few arrivals today, my day has been spent doing little lame tasks just to stay active and keep me from standing still behind my desk. You can only mop, dust, and make a pot of coffee so many times before it just becomes redundant, you know?

The interesting thing about working in a hotel is that you get to see the real face of people. In retail everything is very simple; very transaction-based. Sure there are those customers that you really connect or bond with, but those are few and far between. In the hospitality industry you get an actual good sense of how people act privately as well as in public; it's not just their game face that they're wearing. I've met some very nice and kind adults since working here. I've also met some very spoiled, very self-righteous adults. The kind who can barely handle it when it takes an extra five minutes for a fresh pot of coffee to be made, or who can't follow simple instructions on how to log on to the hotel internets; they expect you to do it for them.

It's not just an American thing, either. Spoiled adults come from all nations, or so I've ascertained. Apparently there are no limits to how truly moronic one can be when they feel as if they've got no time to take a moment, breathe, and think something through before they complain about it. Can't get the door open? Stop shoving your card in, pause for a moment, and carefully/lightly swipe it one more time. Very simple if you just come down and stop acting like it's the biggest and most inconvenient thing in the world, ever.

I really do like my job, though. I don't see myself getting burned out on this industry as fast as I did retail.

Still, I hope that things perk up for me in the writing department. I've had a great time writing again for Mutineer and really hope it brings steady work, or at least work every now and then a few times a year. We'll see what comes of it . . .

. . . I really need a new pair of shorts. None of mine fit me anymore. But when you shoot from a waist size of 34 to a 28 or 29 in just a year, that's bound to happen. I really like this soft linen shorts I found at H&M; they come in khaki or in basic black and they're disturbingly comfy and very well-made. The next time I have thirty bucks, yeah?

I've successfully made the transition to a soda-less life, and I have to say it's been quite an experience. Not only do a find that soda is more convenient than a healthy alternative (seriously--this is another reason why America is obese), but that taste-wise it seems like they don't even want to make diet soda attractive in taste or visual aesthetics. Diet Coke is, I'm sorry, totally atrocious. Diet Dr. Pepper is fairly acceptable. Diet Sprite is my favorite so far in terms of taste. Diet Root Beer of the Barq's variety is absolute nonsense. And why do they even bother to make Diet Red Bull? It does absolutely nothing and, if you read the calorie count, has nearly the same as a can of normal Coke. Worthless! But I've stopped getting it at restaurants, and stopped buying it on-the-go for a pick-me-up, and we only have diet at home. And it's diet soda all the way at bars and clubs.

Speaking of, I really want to go dancing some time soon. Perhaps after I buy my new shorts? But shorts at a club is so blech, unless you're going for a beachy/nautical/I'm adorable and should be on a yacht a'la Nate Archibald from "Gossip Girl" sort of look.

My birthday is in two weeks. I don't know what's planned, but Josh assures me he has everything under control. The control freak in me wants to jump in and take over, but I really don't want to get in his way on this. I had a ton of fun planning his birthday last summer and Julie's birthday this past Novemeber, and I LOVED planning our Halloween Party . . . So part of me really wants to get involved, but it's sort of my birthday, which means I can't and shouldn't butt in too much. What worries me is that he's going to go overboard or stretch his mind and wallet so thin that it will depress him, and then put him in a shitty mood if everything isn't perfect. In reality all I want is just to be drunk with my friends.

24, 24 . . . Will it be different than 23? Sources say no, not really. I'll find out soon!



"Everyone's alive but ill.
Let's just take a deep breath,
And lock the doors so no one;
No one has to know.
I can say I'm doing well,
As long as, as long as I can see the room
From the graveyard shift."

But then again, maybe?

I have to say, I really like the set schedule that my new job provides. Being out of the office at 3pm daily (or earlier depending on my workload) and having weekends off has been absurdly great.

The only bitch of it all has been getting up at 5:30 am every day to make it to work on time (7am). I don't know why, but for some reason my normally 15 min.-long solo showers have turned into 25-30 min. showers at this time of the day. I seemingly zombie-out when the water hits me, I think. Perhaps I should invest in a shower timer?

As long as I have my coffee, nobody gets maimed.

I've made a mix for the drive to work in the wee hours when traffic light and it's still dark out. Unfortunately I'm not at home so I don't have it with me. I'll post it when I have access to the playlist on my iTunes.

So I'm reading Chuck Klosterman's Killing Yourself to Live right now and so far it's enjoyable. I really liked his more recent book IV and generally find his observations very poignant and almost-always absolutely true. He's also a writer who's very aware of his voice and his viewpoint, and doesn't lose sight of either even when writing about or for others. I'm only a few chapters in to KYTL, so my observations at this point are pretty limited and perhaps even unjustifiable until I've read the piece as a whole, but I do have one main criticism thus far: The writer knows he's famous.

It's this weird thing that writers do after they've become a household name--It's not arrogance per se, or some sort of implied superiority to the reader. It's the tone that becomes so matter-of-fact and literal that the writer-as-narrator becomes almost untrustworthy. I find myself thinking "is that really how it is, or just how you perceive it?"

This tone is just fine when a writer claims to be the informed and reliable narrator from the get-go: Political pundits whom write books do this all of the time. We know that Ann Coulter is writing her book to be self-serving and from the viewpoint that she's onehundred percent right and informed before we've hit page 2 (or lately even before we've opened the damned book).

With a writer like C.K., however, his tone throughout the book is often self-reflective and at times even a little self-deprecating. He writes himself as the "every man, regular guy" who his readers can and should identify with. He might not think like us, but his experiences are our experiences and his interactions within his culture are ours as well. He is his reader. And maybe that's the problem?

Thus, when he slips into that tone of "here's how it is, and if you don't know about it or don't agree then you just don't get it" he actually does come off as the aforementioned arrogant fop. His readerhip doesn't like being talked down to any more than I'm sure the writer does. It's that self-awareness of celebrity and (dare I use the term?) "value" as a brand name moreso than an individual that causes this shift; at least that's what my perception is. The writer knows you'll read his book because he's the writer, so of course you trust him. If you don't, then the book is just not for you and why are you reading it, then?

Anyway, this is just an observation made about an entire work in just a few chapters. Maybe it gets better? Maybe the tone shifts will become a central and important part of the narrative? I'll wait and see. The subject matter is too good to pass up, and I don't have anything else to read right now.



"Well all right, so I'm being foolish.
Well all right, so then let people know
About the dreams and wishes you wish
In the nights when the lights are low."

Why does your face look like that?

I'm getting a little tired of people acting like I have a terminal illness.

Let me back up a bit: I don't have a terminal illness. I'm quite healthy, actually. But others have not-so-subtly pointed out to me that I appear to have a debilitating disease where I graduated from college and now am doing nothing.

Let me back up again: I'm not doing "nothing." I've got a job that I work 30 hours a week at, I'm paying bills, and I'm writing all the time. Sure I don't have an internship or a journalism desk job that takes up 95% of my time yet totals 5% of my income, but I'm only hanging around this town until May. I graduated at the end of December, and I'm leaving at the end of May. That's a total of 5 months where I've had to essentially start from scratch and not only try to hone what skills I've earned with my degree, but also try to save money and salvage my post-college/pre-career existence while I can.

So then why do people who ask me what I'm up to cringe when I tell them "not much, just working and hanging out until I move in May?" It's like this weird reflexive action they have which they just can't seem to hide. There's this look as though I've just told them that my dog died, or that I'm going into rehab, or that I have terminal cancer. This sort of knee-jerk widening of the eyes coupled with a thin, smarmy smile and a phrase that carries an air of mock-understanding and sympathy ("Oh, wow, well good. That's good that you're working.").

Sorry folks, I didn't move home with my parents and I didn't just return to my "home town" because if you want to get technical then my home town was Los Angeles. Seriously Idaho, there are other places besides Coeur d'Alene and Boise. I see people all the time on Myspace or Facebook or in the UI Alumni Magazine (which I receive in the mail now along with a helping of guilt for not financially supporting my alma mater) who moved back tot heir home town and have started some kind of career. A guy I graduated with is now working at a TV station in Twin Falls.

But here's the thing: That's Twin. Falls. Idaho.

And that's fine. Do whatever you'd like and go where you'd like to go. It's just that my aspirations go beyond this state. I don't want to just go back to the comforts of home to a place that's familiar. It's the same reason I didn't do community college right after high school. It's the same reason I didn't just try and get a desk job at the local paper here in Moscow. I like to experience new things. I like to live on the edge of my seat. I like having a warm place to call home, but I also like that place to have a sense of wonder or excitement.

Maybe that's why, after 5 years in my undergrad, Moscow has almost completely lost its charm.

I don't know what to see to these people that act as though I've just told them I've been diagnosed with HIV-I when I tell them I'm in a working, hanging out, sort of grace period between my undergrad and the start of my career. Except to tell them that I didn't run home to mommy like everyone else and that I actually have had to work since day 1 in college, and that I've still got to work because I pay my own bills, so that's why I couldn't just up and go home.

I want to tell them to go hang out with the skeptics, who are the other group of people that are infuriating me at the moment (I feel like the Palouse region [meaning Moscow, Pullman, Lewiston, etc.] can be divided up into 3 groups of people right now who are reacting to my life choices: The Sympathies, The Skeptics, and The Supporters). But third-party skepticism of my life choices is a whole other post that's probably more rant-y and less rational.

Oh, internet. I'm glad that I can vent to you. When I look back at this chronicle of my post-grad existence, hopefully it'll be from a place where I can smile and just say "ha."

"Sometimes I feel
That I need to move on.
So I pack a bag
And move on;
Move on."

Filling the gap.

Been a few weeks since I've posted, so rightly I've got to fill the gap with what's been happening in my post-grad existence so far. I know you all want to know, right? Good.

I submitted my article to Diversity News on the 15th along with an e-mail, but so far I haven't heard anything back yet, nor have i heard anything from Kathy regarding what she thought of the article. In all honesty I'm taking the fear-based way out by avoiding Kathy and the crew on Inland Oasis altogether on the off-chance that my article wasn't what they were expecting. This seems to happen a lot to me; people want something but they don't understand that I don't write press releases (unless you ask me to), I write news pieces and those two things are not the same. We'll see if I get published, and I'll keep you up-to-speed if I do. In the mean time I'm going to refrain from posting the piece I wrote just in case.

Work continues to be the main source of sanity, along with Josh and the few friends still living in the area. I'm up to 25 hours a week on average (give or take an hour) with weekends off, which has been nice because I've got to spend more time with Josh but odd because I find myself wasting away hoping the weather clears up. I'd love to take up snowboarding again some day. Maybe after we move? Right now it doesn't make much sense to buy all the equipment, buy a pass, and hope for snowfall in the mountains (when it's the valleys that are presently getting hammered). I should get a gym membership.

Anyone hear about this new President guy? I hear he's a Democrat . . .

. . . WIN!

I've been thinking about getting a Twitter account, but since I can't blog in a mobile way (as I don't have a phone that connects to the internet) I am failing to see the point . . . I just like the way that Twitter looks visually is what it comes down to. And that's not reason enough to spend more time online.

Things are stabilizing financially. I still haven't been able to put more than 2 grand away for the big move but I expect to be able to soon. $50 from every paycheck should get me to about $2,500 by the time we leave in May, plus whatever is sitting in the regular bank account by then. Not too shabby for a moving buffer.

How you know you're getting old #2: You see something on QVC that you might actually like to purchase. 

Today I saw a recipe album with 30 free insert cards, a glass cutting board (with 3 designs to choose from, 'natch) and a cheese knife for a little less than $30. And I thought to myself, "a place for recipes would be good since all we have now are cookbooks with pieces of printer paper and magazine clippings stuffed in them." Then the lady on QVC said the same damn thing, and I nearly fell out of my seat. It's like they know you have only the slightest need for things so they get good at selling them! I didn't buy it. I'm not 50 quite yet.

This blog is a new guilty pleasure for me. It's a little NSFW, so click responsibly.

This week I'll be working, living, and maybe drinking a little. You'll be updated more often, little blog. I promise to update you, and feed and water you every day, and to clean up after you.

"I'll miss the playgrounds and the animals and digging up worms.
I'll miss the comfort of my mother and the weight of the world.
I'll miss my sister, miss my father, miss my dog and my home.
Yeah I'll miss the boredom and the freedom and the time spent alone."

Quick Take

The column for Diversity is coming along well. I'm heading into work soon so I don't have much time to elaborate on it other than to say the World Health Organization's stats on HIV/AIDS are jarring. More on why I needed to look them up later.

"And they carried on like long division,

because it was clear with every page

Oh, that they were farther away from

Any solution that would play."